Intimacy in Marriage
Every newly married couple wants to know how to have great sex. When we were newly married I read a book called Sex Begins in the Kitchen. I don’t remember much about it now except for the catchy title and the main premise that:
Great married sex is more about every moment intimacy than bedroom passion. (<–tweet this)
What is Every Moment Intimacy?
Every moment intimacy is a choice to show love all day long.
- It’s telling him again how lucky you are to belong to him.
- It’s brushing arms as you pass on the way to the bathroom.
- It’s rubbing your arm around his back as you step around him at the dining table.
- It’s being ready with a kiss and a towel as he/she steps out of the shower.
- It’s whispering in her ear how beautiful she is to you.
- It’s holding hands as you walk, or ride in the car.
- It’s playing your favorite love songs and turning down the lights at dinner. (Go ahead! The kids will think it’s fun!)
- It’s hugging her from behind when you find her cooking in the kitchen.
- It’s secretly sticking a love note in his wallet.
- It’s listening with ears and eyes when your beloved speaks.
- It’s a welcome home kiss when he/she walks in the door.
- It’s expressions of appreciation at unexpected times throughout the day.
- It’s a surprise dinner out – alone, and for no reason.
- It’s saying “I love you” at every opportunity.
- It’s having his keys in hand before he has time to say, “Honey, do you know where I left my …”
- It’s calling him at work to giggle that you can’t wait for him to get home.
- It’s bringing your spouse home a certain candy bar just because when you saw it you thought of her/him.
- It’s leaving a love note for her to find while you are away.
- It’s an inside joke with a wink and smile.
Every moment intimacy is a million and one little things you can do outside the bedroom to communicate your love for, your devotion to, and your delight in your beloved.
When a husband and wife cultivate an atmosphere of intimacy throughout the day, they have a much higher likelihood of enjoying physical intimacy later. The physical act of intimacy is made that much sweeter when it is a culmination of your love, not merely a stand alone expression of it.
How do you have great sex? One way is to love on your spouse all day long. Consciously act out your love to him/her in every moment intimacy.
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.” (1 Corinthians 13:4-8)
DaLynn McCoy says
Great post – it’s definitely the little things that matter, and the emotion behind the act that makes it “great” in the bedroom as well. Thanks for sharing!